Things aren’t good in the Motor City suburb of Auburn Hills, where the artists formerly known as the Detroit Pistons toil in mediocrity and, dare I say, obscurity. There was a time when we battled them (check out this epic post to get a taste of the vitriol), and maybe even feared them. But now, we mock them and their pathetic little team. Suckers.

What’s even more fun is watching the web site DetroitBadBoys bursting with fan outrage over the awful Allen Iverson trade. Basically they’re climbing over each other to jump off this bandwagon. Enjoy boys, the water’s nice and cold in the lake this year.

Take a look at this open letter to the brass of Detroit

Detroit’s “rugged” defense ranks 21st in field-goal percentage allowed (.4606) — they were third in the league last year. All that trapping from the young guns? Maxiell is averaging nearly five fewer minutes a game compared to last year (despite the absence of Antonio McDyess for most of the year) and the team ranks just 25th in turnovers forced (13.6 a game).

Pushing the tempo? The team ranks 26th in offensive pace. Establishing the low post? Over 43% of Rasheed Wallace’s field-goal attempts have come from beyond the arc, by far the highest rate of his career.

Literally everything that was promised hasn’t happened, or at least hasn’t happened frequently enough to be considered part of the team’s identity. Did trading Chauncey Billups for Allen Iverson throw a wrench in Curry’s plans? Undoubtedly, but that doesn’t justify drifting aimlessly along, changing gears on a whim and leaving everybody confused what’s happening.

Maybe in some parallel universe, Rip Hamilton and Allen Iverson can share the same backcourt and thrive, but I don’t see it happening here. That said, moving Hamilton to small forward isn’t a real solution; it’s a temporary band-aid that’s only going to make things more awkward when the Pistons face a team with a big frontcourt and Curry needs to re-insert a legitimate big man. If Stuckey keeps playing as well as he has the last several games, can you really look him in the eye and tell him he needs to sit? Or do you risk alienating your highest-paid player by telling AI he needs to come off the bench?

So friends, please go over to their web site and remind them that we’re 20-2 and they’re not. Make sure you take out as much flesh as you can and enjoy the fruits of victory. Or, as our friend Conan said: